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Woulda … Coulda … Shoulda

I used to look longingly at life, wishing for things that I didn’t think I could have, or do, or be. I realized that there were so many things that I wished I’d done or tried, and it made me sad. So I made a decision to face my fears, try more new things and eliminate woulda, coulda, shoulda from my vocabulary (“I wish I woulda”, “I coulda done that”, “I shoulda tried, etc.). 

From that point on, when faced with a new opportunity that scared me, one that in the past I would have talked myself out of trying for fear of failure, I began to list the worst case scenario. I would ask myself, “what’s the worst that could happen and can I live with that?”. I discovered that the answer was often YES. And not only could I live with the worst that could happen, I was so excited by the possibility of the best that could happen … and how my life could change if it did.

I realized that I can live with failure … and learn from it, or with embarrassment … and recover from it, but I can’t live with regret. Regret stays with you and in subtle ways destroys your inner peace. It gives your inner critic more ammunition to berate you and it gives your fears more power to stop you in your tracks.

I realized that I can live with failure, and learn from it … or with embarrassment, and recover from it, but I can’t live with regret. Regret stays with you and in subtle ways destroys your inner peace. It gives your inner critic more ammunition to berate you and it gives your fears more power to stop you in your tracks.

So next time you desire something with all of your heart, ask yourself, “can I live with the worst that can happen?” and “how would my life change if the best did happen?”.  You might be surprised at how much inner courage your answers give you.

Enjoy!