While Bella did survive the initial attacks, despite the efforts of some amazing vets, she ultimately did succumb to her wounds and passed away one week later.

The incredible love, support and help I received along the way was so divine in its unfolding. I don’t know how I would have navigated it as well as I did, without my amazing friends, family, neighbors and supporters. While I may never completely understand why this happened, I do recognize the number of synchronistic events it took for this to unfold as it did. Even with that recognition, it's still a heart-wrenching challenge to navigate through the lessons and opportunities that are sometimes brought to us in times of trauma, drama and tragedy.

Loss has unfortunately become an all too common theme for me in the past 5 years with the loss of 7 loved ones. In addition to my 2 fur babies (Bella last week and Nikita late last year), I also lost my dad, step-father, an aunt, along with my cousin and her son, who each took their own life within 6 months of each other. "Wow" and "WTF" are thoughts that have invaded my mind with each new loss or tragedy… and this one is no different.

What has been clear for me through this loss with Bella, is that there is something profound within it for me that is still unfolding. While all loss has the potential to open us up, in this situation I have been called (yelled at actually) to fully open my heart and remain open through all of the pieces that are yet to be revealed.

So in my most raw and vulnerable moments, I discovered some powerful hits of clarity and insight, overwhelming love and support, and amazing moments of synchronicity. I have also experienced profound sorrow, deep guilt and regret, shock at an $8,000 vet bill (which I would do again for the chance to save her) and intense anger and frustration at the owner of the other dog that has refused to accept any responsibility.

Through all of this I have discovered that being in my heart and having an open heart is not the same thing. The first one challenges me to allow my heart to guide and lead me forward. The second and more difficult one requires me to also be willing to be open, raw and vulnerable; to own, feel and allow in everything without pretense, avoidance or denial. It requires my heart walls to come down – and those walls have been up for a long time!

Whew… what a journey. Thank you for allowing me to share. Sending you all my love.