Angel Whispers Blog

What is happiness… what does it take to create a happier life?

What really makes you feel good has less to do with what’s around you and more to do with what’s within you – it’s not the having something that defines happiness, but how it makes you feel. For example, a loving relationship for one person can leave them feeling supported and safe. For another, it can activate so many insecurities that they end up feeling anxious and uncertain.

The only path to truly feeling happy and satisfied in life is to uncover and discover the parts of you that know how to feel worthy enough to have what you want.

Do you feel that you need others to change so that you can be happy? Are these familiar thoughts (or comments) for you – "if only they would do this… or not do that… or be more like this, then everything would be better."?

Now here’s the interesting thing – when someone else’s behavior is a challenge for you, it’s often because they are pushing against an inner fear or insecurity that you hold. You want them to change so you can feel better… so that you can feel some relief from the emotional discomfort you are currently feeling. The challenge is that this is just a temporary fix. If you don’t deal with the actual issue, which is your internal wound, then someone or something else will come along to push against it.

I used to look longingly at life, wishing for things that I didn’t think I could have, or do, or be. I realized that there were so many things that I wished I’d done or tried, and it made me sad. So I made a decision to face my fears, try more new things and eliminate woulda, coulda, shoulda from my vocabulary ("I wish I woulda", "I coulda done that", "I shoulda tried that", etc.).

From that point on, when faced with a new opportunity that scared me, one that in the past I would have talked myself out of trying for fear of failure, I began to list the worst case scenario. I would ask myself, "what’s the worst that could happen and can I live with that?". I discovered that the answer was often YES. And not only could I live with the worst that could happen, I was so excited by the possibility of the best that could happen… and how my life could change if it did.

Do you know the purpose of fear in your life?

To clarify, I am not taking about caution. Caution is an intuitive message intended to guide you, act as a warning, or keep you safe. A message of caution will tell you to do something… or to not do something, but it will generally have action associated with it. or example, "do this", "this isn’t the right thing for you", "be on guard", "run", etc. These messages should be listened to.

Now, fear is different. With fear you feel distressed, nervous or worried, but often you’re not quite sure why. It generally shows up when you’re about to do something new or different, and leaves you feeling that something might be wrong… or more so, you might be wrong.

What would it be like if your motto in life were "I am going to be happy, doing the things that I love and creating the life I desire"… what would different? How would you be different?

If this became your guiding force, what would you change or eliminate? Would you make different decisions… maybe have more fun… look at the world through different eyes… experience new things?

Wherever you choose to place your attention, that becomes the motivation behind your choices, decisions, actions, reactions and perspective. While it might seem simplistic, the more often you can decide to follow what feels good, the easier it becomes for your inner wisdom to guide you towards that.

The act of appreciation creates a change; when you can find something to appreciate in your experiences, it changes what you think and feel and therefore, changes a part of you.

You are an accumulation of all that you have experienced, along with what you believe about those experiences, and who you became from them. That is an important distinction… you are not simply a product of your environment, but rather a product of who you chose to become as a result them. When you can look at the challenges of your life and allow them to reveal a message or provide guidance, then you turn that challenge into an opportunity to learn, change and grow.